Loser Chef's Diary: A New Paradigm for 21st Century Cooking

Before going to sleep, LoserChef would like to also present the Puklear Weapon. This is also the first dish that was made from stolen ingredients (having invaded a former girlfriend's apartment using a spare key that was trusted to LoserChef, unmistakably a mistake), earning LC the secondary title, GuerrillaChef.

Ingredients are unknown (whatever had begun to rot in gf's fridge while she was gone) except fresh mushrooms. LoserChef announces plans for upcoming book "How to Cook Friends and Influence Cabbage" --a single-page edible book printed with soy-based ink (also available as an e-book that can be sneezed upon).

Ping-pang is a crossover concept (Yin-yang by Ping-pong) that LoserChef invented on a day without sleep. Ping-pang is a collision of potentially complementary items --so they (almost, somewhat, maybe) complement each other, but they definitely collide (aggress, clash, etc.). You can see the fierce collision in ping-pong players; they are so aggressive, beating the hell out of that poor ball (I have a ping-pong ball, and I love it, then someone sat on it, we boiled it in water and it was round again). But you can see how ping-pong players also complement each other so well. If one of them refuses to play, the game is over, no fun. Or if one doesn't match the other's level, again, no fun. So, this intense beating of the ping-pong ball back and forth is also a wonderful yin-yang relationship at the same time. A kind of dance that LoserChef is hoping to do with every single thing and event that comes across his path.

Thus, LoserChef begins his Ping-Pang series and first up is the very accident that led to this creation. LoserChef does not understand why Herring is so salty. Neither does he understand why Brussel Balls taste so bland and even bitter. But when he has them home at the same time, he creates a Ping-Pang sandwich of Herring pieces stuffed into Brussel Balls sliced with a knife (after Brussel Balls have been cooked for a random duration in water). Now, LoserChef enjoys the combined taste, as stable and consistent as a ray of sunlight travelling from the Sun to Earth. Neither salty, nor bitter, but both at the same time. Fierce and complementary... LoserChef will evaluate some AramarkChefs now and then go sleep.